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Unger Suspicion

Unger Suspicion

67-year-old Mennonite Man Measures 6 7

September 20, 2025 Andrew

MOUNTAIN LAKE, MN Area man Earl Klassen is celebrating his birthday this week by consuming 67 pieces of plautz. “How old are you, Earl?” said friend Dave. “Are you 60 …6 or is it 7?” […]

Unger Suspicion

Area Person Has Opinion About Issue

September 11, 2025 Andrew

PLACE Area person has opinion about issue and has expressed that opinion about issue on social media. “I couldn’t let this issue pass without formulating and expressing an opinion about it,” said Area Person. “It’s […]

Unger Suspicion

Encounter with Radiohead Song Sends Swiftie into Existential Crisis

September 7, 2025 Andrew

WINKLER, MB A recent encounter with Radiohead’s seminal 1997 track “Let Down” on TikTok  has spiralled Winkler-area Swiftie Melissa Sawatzky into a profound state of existential angst this week. “Never heard such a sad and […]

Unger Suspicion

Man Stands Up During Q&A to Tell His Entire Life Story

September 6, 2025 Andrew

SASKATOON, SK Area man Pete Krahn, 62, did not have a question for the speaker at a local conference this afternoon, but instead stood up and launched into an irrelevant 20 minute anecdote about his […]

Unger Suspicion

Man with Debit Machine in Hand Braces to Answer About His “Plans for the Rest of the Evening”

September 2, 2025 Andrew

SWIFT CURRENT, SK Area man Collin Penner, 41, recoiled in horror as he was handed the payment terminal at his local burger joint this Monday evening. “I tried to punch in the numbers quick and […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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