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Unger Suspicion

Unger Suspicion

“Because it’s 2019,” Trudeau Says as He Ejects Women from Caucus

April 3, 2019 Andrew

OTTAWA, ON Deciding that the “whole crazy experiment” of having a diverse range of opinions in his caucus and cabinet was a “bad idea” after all, Prime Minister Trudeau has removed Jody Wilson-Raybould and Jane […]

Unger Suspicion

Andrew Scheer Sends Everyone in Canada Some Stupid Cat Meme

March 30, 2019 Andrew

OTTAWA, ON Eager to capitalize on this hip new technology he just discovered called “texting,” Conservative leader Andrew Scheer sent, like, totally everyone in the country a really stupid cat meme he happened to find […]

Unger Suspicion

Winnipeg Man Gets 20 Years in Prison for Stealing A&W Mug

March 29, 2019 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB A 40-year-old man from Winnipeg was sentenced to twenty years in a maximum security prison this week for stealing an A&W root beer mug back in 1998. “For years it was a cold […]

Unger Suspicion

NBC Gives New ‘Friends’ Reboot a Mennonite Twist

March 27, 2019 Andrew

NEW YORK, NY Executives at NBC have announced the hotly-anticipated reboot of the hit 90s sitcom ‘Friends’. The new show, which features an all new cast from the Paraguayan Chaco, is called ‘Frintschoft’ and has […]

Unger Suspicion

Granola Shortage Creates Panic in Wolseley

March 20, 2019 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB A massive granola shortage this spring has residents of the Winnipeg neighbourhood of Wolseley in quite the panic. Desperate residents met at an area United church to discuss the shortage. “Went to the […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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