TORONTO, ON After stiff negotiations, the City of Toronto has reached a trade deal with the City of St. Louis to trade their NBA Championship Trophy for a Stanley Cup. “Of course, St. Louis doesn’t […]
OTTAWA, ON Ahh, the Canadian Senate, a collection of old irrelevant out-of-touch people who somehow have the power to make decisions around here…oh, wait, are we talking about the elder board? Well, there are some […]
TORONTO, ON After witnessing the incredible healing powers of his touch, hip-hop superstar and NBA megafan Drake has been hired by the Toronto Raptors as official team trajchtmoaka. “It’s a new position for us. Something […]
EDMONTON, AB Representatives from the vinegar industry are feeling pretty darn neglected as Alberta Premier Jason Kenney seems to be spending all his time defending oil. “He’s just oil this and oil that. I get […]
MANILA, PHILIPPINES In recent days, Malaysia has joined the Philippines in denouncing Canada and demanding that Justin Bieber be returned to North America. “We’re sick and tired of Canada sending us all their unwanted trash,” […]
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