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The Daily Bonnet

Your trusted source for Mennonite satire.

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The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Woman Fills Tub…Then Adds Water

July 3, 2017 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Sometimes art imitates life, while other times life imitates art. Well, for one Mennonite lady, it was definitely a case of the latter, because, just as in the classic Mennonite joke, Mrs. Froese completely filled […]

The Daily Bonnet

What Are the 150 Most Significant Moments in Canadian Mennonite History?

June 30, 2017 Andrew

Canada turns 150 years old tomorrow, so the Daily Bonnet has compiled a list of the 150 50 great, and not-so-great, moments in Canadian Mennonite history. These are all real (not satire) and in chronological order. […]

The Daily Bonnet

Report: Cows Don’t Like Being Tipped

June 30, 2017 Andrew

SASKATOON, SK According to a recent study from the University of Saskatoon, cows, particularly Holsteins and Herefords, prefer not to be tipped over on their sides while they sleep. “It’s shocking really,” said study co-ordinator […]

The Daily Bonnet

High German Mennonite Clings Desperately to False Sense of Superiority Over Low German Mennonite

June 28, 2017 Andrew

BLUMENBACH, SK Thanks to a complete accident of birth, Miss Annie B. Epp of Blumenbach was born to a High German speaking family. For some reason, Epp, a sad and delusional woman, believes that this linguistic […]

The Daily Bonnet

Homewrecker Wrecks Record 30th Home

June 27, 2017 Andrew

KITCHENER, ON During a homewrecking career that spanned more than six decades, local seductress Alice Kehler, 81, has been responsible for the break-up of a record thirty marriages in the Kitchener area. “I think I have […]

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