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The Daily Bonnet

Your trusted source for Mennonite satire.

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The Daily Bonnet

Thrift Store Confuses Shot Glasses for Candle Holders

October 28, 2017 Andrew

NEW HOLLAND, PA More than three dozen shot glasses were mislabeled as candleholders at the local MCC store this week. It was the largest mislabeling of booze containers since volunteers at the MB church confused […]

The Daily Bonnet

Rhoda Janzen’s Little Black Dress Fetches $5 Million on eBay

October 24, 2017 Andrew

FRESNO, CA Best-selling Mennonite writer and scholar Rhoda Janzen’s little black dress shattered online auction records this week, eventually selling for just over $5 million. Not only did the auction break records for Mennonite-worn dresses, […]

The Daily Bonnet

Retired ‘Main Street Cruiser’ to Become ‘Sunday Driver’

October 23, 2017 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Local man Menno Fast, 61, is officially retiring from driving up and down Winkler Main Street in his ’96 Honda Civic on Friday nights to, instead, drive really slow in an ’03 Buick […]

The Daily Bonnet

A List of Mennonite Job Interview Questions (and How to Answer Them)

October 20, 2017 Andrew

It’s a competitive job market out there and you’ve got to be prepared. Thankfully, the Daily Bonnet is here to help. We’ve created a list of the most common questions asked by Mennonite bosses during […]

The Daily Bonnet

Steinbach the Most Profanity-Free City in North America

October 17, 2017 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB For the third year in a row Steinbach has come out on tops of the annual profanity audit by the Canadian Society for Clean Language. Society President Richard Fuchs says the rate of […]

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