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Unger the Influence

The Daily Bonnet

Winkler Sees Surge in ‘West Reserve Alienation’ After Election Results

October 24, 2019 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Residents of the former Mennonite West Reserve (or Jantsied as it’s more commonly known) have become increasingly disenchanted with the state of politics at the present day. This feeling of alienation is so […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Couple Accidentally Cancel Out Each Other’s Vote

October 21, 2019 Andrew

MITCHELL, MB The Hieberts stopped by at the polls during their lunch break today intent on doubling the power of their votes by casting their ballots for the same candidate. “Normally we discuss this ahead […]

Unger Suspicion

Local Paper Candidate Asking for Your Vote on Monday

October 20, 2019 Andrew

KLEINESCHANTZENBERG, SK After a vigorous campaign that involved getting a name on a ballot and laying about on a desk for the next six weeks, the local Paper candidate is hoping for your vote on […]

The Daily Bonnet

Heated Political Discussion Leads to Brawl at Friesen Thanksgiving Gathering

October 13, 2019 Andrew

ALTONA, MB Uncle Henry, 71, had his own nephew Peter, 20, in a headlock this Sunday after Mrs. Friesen didn’t keep a tight enough rein on the political discussions around the dinner table. “I should […]

Unger Suspicion

Desperate to Woo Trudeau Supporters, Maxime Bernier Renames New Party ‘The Peoplekind Party of Canada’

October 11, 2019 Andrew

GATINEAU, QC Eager to move up a bit in the polls, sixth-place Maxime Bernier has decided a little tweaking of his party name just might do the trick. “I can’t figure it out. For some […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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