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Unger Conviction

Unger Conviction

What Happens if We Use Google Translate on Our Favourite Mennonite Hymns?

March 1, 2020 Andrew

I’m sure we’ve all tried Google Translate once in a while. Much to my chagrin it does not have a Plautdietsch option. But maybe that’s okay because we all know that it doesn’t work 100% […]

Unger Conviction

Emergency Backup Preacher Fills In for Injured Senior Pastor

February 25, 2020 Andrew

LINDEN, AB After Senior Pastor Bob went down with mono just minutes before the start of the 10:30 service, the congregation at South Linden Mennonite was scrambling for a replacement. With the associate pastor pre-occupied […]

Unger Conviction

Elder Board Acquits Mennonite Pastor of Bribing Mrs. Friesen

February 7, 2020 Andrew

ROSENHOF, MB After the Faspa Committee overwhelmingly voted to oust Pastor Ron for allegedly bribing Mrs. Friesen to make fried rather than boiled vereniki at last Sunday’s luncheon, the West Rosenhof MGM Grand Church elder […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Man Points Out Speck of Sawdust in Brother’s Eye

February 4, 2020 Andrew

KIDRON, OH Mr. Hofstetter just couldn’t believe the size of the speck in Mr. Horst’s eye this week and made sure to point it out to him in the church lobby on Sunday. “Would you […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Church to Host First Annual ‘Quiet in the Land’ Death Metal Festival

January 15, 2020 Andrew

ELKHART, IN In an effort to attract young people to church, the South Elkhart Mennonite Church is planning a death metal concert to be held in the church parking lot this summer. “In keeping with […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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