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Unger Conviction

Unger Conviction

Chaos in Church Kitchen as Pickle Dishes Discovered in Cream and Sugar Cupboard

February 5, 2024 Andrew

GRUNTHAL, MB Chaos erupted in the South Grunthal Mennonite church kitchen this week after the labels fell off the cupboards, leaving pickle dishes in with cream and sugar and teaspoons in the chipped saucer drawer. […]

Unger Conviction

Commuter Sets Record for Consecutive Days Dining Alone in Bible College Cafeteria

February 1, 2024 Andrew

BIEBELPLATZ, AB Area man Jeremy Goerzen, 20, decided he’d save a bit of cash this year and commute to Biebelplatz Bible College from Calgary. But little did Jeremy know what this decision would do for […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Church Lifts Television Ban Just in Time For that New Menno Sitcom

January 3, 2024 Andrew

WINKLER, MB The MBEMMMCGC Church of Winkler has allowed a “temporary dispensation” to allow parishioners to buy a used TV from the thrift store, prop it up on a bale in the yard, and watch […]

Unger Conviction

Pastor to Defer $6800 Per Year in Unusual Arrangement with Local Mennonite Church

December 14, 2023 Andrew

FRESNO, CA Free agent pastor Sharon O. Broesky, a two-way minister who can preach as well as she can baptize, was a hot commodity on the pastoral market this fall and has just inked an […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Pastor Embarks on Worldwide ‘Eras Tour’

November 25, 2023 Andrew

FERNHEIM COLONY, PARAGUAY Pastor Dave R. Schmidt of Fernheim Colony, Paraguay has just announced a worldwide ‘Eras Tour’ during which he plans to preach sermons and sing songs representing 500 years of Mennonite history and […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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