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Articles by Andrew

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Man Nails ’95 Theses’ to the Door of Local Church

November 11, 2016 Andrew

CLEARSPRING, MB 500 years after the Protestant Reformation began, area man Martin Loewen was so fed up with what he claimed were lapses from the truth faith that he nailed a list of 95 things […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonites Gather Today to Solemnly Forget

November 11, 2016 Andrew

WINKLER, MB During his annual Forgetfulness Day service, Reverend B. B. Broesky Jr. told congregants that there were many awful thing that happened in the past and it was best just to move on and […]

Unger Conviction

I Did Not Come to Bring Peace, But a Sword

November 11, 2016 Andrew

You have selected: “I did not come to bring peace, but a sword.” Please enjoy the following Bible verses on the topic of violence: “Do not suppose that I have come to bring peace to […]

Unger Suspicion

Leonard Cohen’s ‘Hallelujah’ Added to Mennonite Hymnal

November 10, 2016 Andrew

MONTREAL, PQ In a tribute to one of the world’s great songwriters, the Mennonite Church has decided to add Leonard Cohen’s ‘Hallelujah’ to the hymnal, saying that it is “as beautiful and sacred as anything that’s […]

The Daily Bonnet

Small Town Residents Gather to Gawk at Mini Cooper

November 10, 2016 Andrew

FRIEDENSFELD, MB The presence of out-of-town yuppies in a 2006 Mini Cooper this week sparked a spontaneous outpouring of gawking as locals lined the streets to say, “hey, would you look at that!” while the […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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