The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About
  • Merch
  • Andrew Unger

Articles by Andrew

Unger Suspicion

Leonard Cohen’s ‘Hallelujah’ Added to Mennonite Hymnal

November 10, 2016 Andrew

MONTREAL, PQ In a tribute to one of the world’s great songwriters, the Mennonite Church has decided to add Leonard Cohen’s ‘Hallelujah’ to the hymnal, saying that it is “as beautiful and sacred as anything that’s […]

The Daily Bonnet

Small Town Residents Gather to Gawk at Mini Cooper

November 10, 2016 Andrew

FRIEDENSFELD, MB The presence of out-of-town yuppies in a 2006 Mini Cooper this week sparked a spontaneous outpouring of gawking as locals lined the streets to say, “hey, would you look at that!” while the […]

The Daily Bonnet

Plautdietsch Classified as an ‘Endangered Species’ in Steinbach

November 9, 2016 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB As Steinbach has grown, it has become more diverse, and some might even say, “metropolitan.” Long gone are the days when elderly Mennonite men would greet young women at the Clearspring Mall with, “Hia es […]

The Daily Bonnet

Completely Exhausted With Politics, Mennonites Return to Their Farms

November 9, 2016 Andrew

GOSHEN, IN After a totally exhausting Presidential election campaign, millions of Mennonites across America are returning to their farms, claiming they are “done with politics, like, forever.” “I’m plum tuckered out,” said Henry Willems, shovelling cow […]

The Daily Bonnet

Early Results Show Mennonite Pastor in Commanding Lead

November 8, 2016 Andrew

DAYTON, VA After just seventeen votes counted, CNN reports that Reverend Johan Wisler has a commanding lead for Presidency of the United States. “This is a complete shocker,” said CNN’s Wolf Blitzer. “Based on these […]

Posts pagination

« 1 … 668 669 670 … 710 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Mennonites Suspected in $20 Million Golden Syrup Heist at Pearson Airport
    April 20, 2023
  • Trump Wins Inaugural Nobel Prize for Soccer
    December 6, 2025
  • Local Church Becomes 7-Eleven Franchise So it Can Reopen as an Essential Service
    December 9, 2020
  • 10 Hottest Mennonite Spices Ranked in Order of Spiciness
    February 10, 2024
  • Gulf of Mexico Becomes Latest Victim of Cancel Culture
    January 23, 2025

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2025 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved