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Articles by Andrew

The Daily Bonnet

New Logo Means Andrew Unger is Stuck with these Glasses

April 10, 2023 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB When rebranding The Daily Bonnet as The Unger Review a few months ago, author Andrew Unger knew the site needed a new logo and immediately settled upon the most obvious characteristic of his […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Children Excited for Annual Paska Bun Hunt

April 9, 2023 Andrew

LEAMINGTON, ON The Koops gathered in Leamington this Sunday for the annual Koop Paska bun hunt. This year the delicious white icing was delicately applied by Oma Koop right before the uncles hid the buns […]

Unger Suspicion

‘Destitute’ Galen Weston to Subsist Entirely on ‘No Name Brand’ Products

April 8, 2023 Andrew

BRAMPTON, ON Left with just barely enough income to survive in today’s economy, Loblaws CEO Galen Weston has been forced to try his own No Name Brand products for the very first time. “Yikes. I […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Man to Start Drinking Bud Light Just So He Has Something to Boycott

April 7, 2023 Andrew

SCHANZENBERG, MB After Bud Light apparently went “woke” this week, conservative country singers are urging folks to join them in a boycott of the brewing company. This came as a great disappointment for Mr. Dave […]

Unger & Thirst

Raisin Buns at Church Lunch Seen as ‘Really Bad Omen’

April 6, 2023 Andrew

KLEEFELD, MB As the Kleefeld MBCC church gathered for their spring lunch this week, many Mennonites felt a little uneasy as each table had a basket of raisin buns. “What are they trying to tell […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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