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Month: October 2022

The Daily Bonnet

Winnipeg Man Buys Fancy New Car to Drive on World’s Shittiest Roads

October 21, 2022 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Area man Dave Peters parlayed 40-years of chicken catching money into a sweet new sports car this week, but quickly realized there wasn’t a single decent road in the entire city he could […]

Unger & Thirst

Protestors Toss Borscht at Van Gogh Painting

October 20, 2022 Andrew

ALTONA, MB Protesting the high cost of sunflower seeds, angry Mennonites hurled margarine containers of warmed-up cabbage borscht at the giant Van Gogh painting in Altona, Manitoba this morning. “Well, they attempted to, anyway,” said […]

Unger Suspicion

Danielle Smith Flees to La Crete, Alberta

October 19, 2022 Andrew

LA CRETE, AB After making a series of ridiculous comments in just her first few days in office, new Alberta Premier Danielle Smith has decided to flee to the most remote location she can think […]

The Daily Bonnet

Steinbach Transit Purchases New Fleet of Honda Civics

October 18, 2022 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Area seniors are really excited that the City of Steinbach has finally approved the long-awaited public transit system. “We’ve contracted 20-year-olds in Honda Civics to pick up any grandmas they see and drive […]

Unger Suspicion

Area Man to Corner You at the Water Cooler Tomorrow Morning and Tell You All About the Latest Joe Rogan Podcast

October 17, 2022 Andrew

CALGARY, AB Area man Jeremy Goertzen is really pumped about something he heard on Joe Rogan recently and is now planning to find you at the water cooler tomorrow morning and tell you all about […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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