The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About The Unger Review
  • Andrew Unger

Month: January 2020

Unger Games

Patriots Release Tom Brady to Pursue CFL Opportunities

January 7, 2020 Andrew

BOSTON, MA After proving himself for close to twenty years on the smaller American field, it looks like former Patriots quarterback Tom Brady will finally be getting his shot at the CFL. “We’ve had scouts […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Family Working on Same Jigsaw Puzzle Since 1987

January 6, 2020 Andrew

DIDSBURY, AB The Epp family of Didsbury has been working on the same 1,000 piece jigsaw puzzle since the Easter gathering of 1987. “We’ve still got a ways to go,” said Grandma Epp, 93. “Since […]

Unger Suspicion

Americans Feel So Much Safer After Assassination of Some Guy They Never Heard of Before

January 4, 2020 Andrew

SEMINOLE, TX Mr. Dueck of Seminole is breathing a sigh of relief this morning after it was revealed that some guy he’d never heard of before was now dead. “Finally I can sleep at night!” […]

The Daily Bonnet

Extended Family Gathering Relegated to Well Outside the Christmas Week

January 3, 2020 Andrew

LA CRETE, AB Now that all the Krahn cousins have grown up and have children of their own, the Krahn gathering has been relegated to sometime in January at the Pizza Place for “whoever can […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Finally Has Something to be Truly ‘Holier Than Thou’ About

January 2, 2020 Andrew

LANCASTER, PA After years of smugly pointing out the sins of others in the church lobby and in local coffee shops, self-proclaimed near-sinless holy man Mr. Zook of Lancaster has finally discovered something to truly […]

Posts pagination

« 1 … 5 6 7 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Like and Share if You Think People Should Stop Indicating their Agreement by Liking and Sharing
    September 5, 2018
  • Mennonites Just Realized that the Last Day of 2023 Will be ‘Eent Twee Dree Eent Twee Dree’
    December 30, 2023
  • Mennonite Man Accused of Flipping Off the Pastor
    November 9, 2023
  • Mennonite Man to Start Drinking Bud Light Just So He Has Something to Boycott
    April 7, 2023
  • Corny vs. Menno? Which name do you hear?
    May 19, 2018

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2025 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved