The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About
  • Merch
  • Andrew Unger

weapons

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite to Join ‘Golden Dome’ Program

May 21, 2025 Andrew

WASHINGTON, DC The White House’s new $175 billion ‘golden dome’ defence program seems bound for completion this week after the administration got the Mennonites on board. “Nah, junges, normally we only have the golden domes […]

Unger Suspicion

United States Signs $110 Billion Weapons Deal with Random Guy on eBay

May 25, 2017 Andrew

WASHINGTON, DC From tanks and planes, to missiles and atomic bombs, the United States Department of Defense recently made billions of dollars worth of high powered military equipment available to “whoever the hell wants them” on Internet […]

Unger Suspicion

‘Pacifism is Totally Impractical’ Says Large Multinational Weapons Manufacturer

December 1, 2016 Andrew

WASHINGTON, DC Arms industry leaders met in Washington this week to discuss ways of curbing the growing wave of pacifism that’s sweeping the nation. “How the hell can we expect to keep the economy going […]

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Quilt Cartel Jacks Up Prices at Mennonite Relief Sale
    May 27, 2018
  • Swift Current Residents Furious at Taylor Swift for Leaving Their City Off Her 2025 Tour
    June 22, 2023
  • Mennonite Man Starts Innovative New Jazz Label ‘EMC Records’ Guaranteed to Have No Sax
    January 8, 2024
  • Water Softener Salt Sits at Door for Months
    April 8, 2019
  • Long-Suffering Vegas Knights Fan Finally Sees His Team Win the Cup
    April 10, 2018

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2026 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved