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portage and main

Unger Games

Portage and Main Pedestrians Fuel Rumours Jets Won the Cup

June 28, 2025 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Rumours about a Winnipeg Jets Stanley Cup victory have been spreading this weekend after pedestrians were spotted crossing Portage and Main for the first time since the mid-70s. “People above ground at Portage […]

Unger Suspicion

Bombers to Win Grey Cup Every Day Just So Portage and Main Can Stay Open to Pedestrians

December 14, 2021 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB The Winnipeg Blue Bombers have decided to do a great service to the community by winning the Grey Cup every afternoon around 4 pm just so that pedestrians will have access to Portage […]

Unger Suspicion

Portage and Main Barricades to be Moved to Main and Brandt

October 24, 2018 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB It seems that Steinbach has taken a cue from it’s larger neighbour to the north and has decided to barricade Main and Brandt and force pedestrians to cross the intersection through poorly-lit pathways […]

Unger Suspicion

Portage and Main to be Accessed Exclusively by Blizzards and Ice Storms

September 26, 2018 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB The votes are in and Winnipeg has decided overwhelmingly to restrict access to its most famous intersection to anything other than fierce winds, massive blizzards, devastating ice storms and maybe a tornado or […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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