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politics

The Daily Bonnet

Winklerites Furious as Morden Woman Elected Leader

February 3, 2022 Andrew

WINKLER, MB A massive crowd of pickup trucks gathered at the Co-op in Winkler tonight to protest the selection of “a woman from Morden yet” as leader of the Conservatives. “Oba, nay, not Morden once […]

Unger Suspicion

Truckers Demand Trudeau Come Out of Hiding and Face Them in This Dunk Tank

February 1, 2022 Andrew

OTTAWA, ON Protestors gathered in the nation’s capital this weekend are demanding that Prime Minister Justin Trudeau “come out of hiding” and appear before them in “one of them dunk tank things we’ve got set […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonites Demand the Return of Prime Minister Stephen Harder

January 15, 2022 Andrew

OTTAWA, ON Mennonites gathered in various angry Facebook groups over the weekend to give thumbs up to a wide variety of memes calling for the replacement of Prime Minister Trudeau with Stephen Harder. “Oba, things […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Politician Tweets Photo of Wife Mucking the Stalls After 12-Hour Nursing Shift

January 11, 2022 Andrew

NEUSCHANZENHOF, MB Not wanting anyone to outdo the Mennos when it comes to ill-advised Tweets, Manitoba politician Ernie Janzen, 61, quickly snapped a photo of his wife Doris mucking the stalls just after she came […]

Unger Suspicion

Joe Biden to be Replaced with Napping Mennonite Man

December 7, 2021 Andrew

GOESSEL, KS After a tight vote in the US Senate, President Joe Biden has been ousted and will be replaced with a half-asleep Mennonite man from just outside Goessel, Kansas. “Shhh, you don’t want to […]

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