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Unger Conviction

Canada to Increase Peace and Pacifism Budget to 5% of GDP

August 31, 2025 Andrew

OTTAWA, ON After pressure from the country’s Mennonite population, the government of Canada has decided to reallocate its entire military budget into efforts to promote peace and pacifism. “Our goal is to spend 5% of […]

Unger Conviction

Lukewarm Christian Has Only One Conservative Sign in His Yard

April 25, 2025 Andrew

NIVERVILLE, MB Rumours are swirling this week after area man Dave Dueck demonstrated an insufficient level of enthusiasm for the Conservative Party of Canada. “Everyone else has Ted Falk signs popping up like weeds,” said […]

Unger Suspicion

Man Who Hates and Distrusts Billionaires Sure Loves Billionaires

January 5, 2025 Andrew

CALGARY, AB Area man Pat Dyck has had a strong distrust of billionaires for quite some time now. According to his frequent Facebook posts, billionaires are always up to no good, cannot be trusted, and […]

Unger the Influence

Justin Trudeau Plans to Stick Around Long Enough to Become the Next Joe Biden

June 29, 2024 Andrew

OTTAWA, ON Despite losing a safe seat in Toronto this week, Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau plans to stick around for a while, just like his inspiration south of the border Joe Biden. “Look at […]

Unger Conviction

Louisiana Requires All Schools to Display Pictures of Charlton Heston

June 27, 2024 Andrew

BATON ROUGE, LA Starting this fall all Louisiana schools will be required to display life-size portraits of Charlton Heston. Teachers will be asked to photocopy 8.5 x 11 images from the 1956 classic film The […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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