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gardening

Unger the Influence

Roundup Introduces New Product to Eliminate Election Signs in Your Yard

October 21, 2026 Andrew

MITCHELL, MB Pesticide manufacture Roundup has just announced a new product specifically designed to get rid of those pesky election signs in your yard. “We’re really excited to bring this new product to the market,” […]

Unger Suspicion

Mennonite Woman Struggles to Keep Dandelions, Quackgrass, and AI Data Centres Out of Her Garden This Year

July 7, 2026 Andrew

CHILLIWACK, BC Area woman Doris Reimer, 74, has planted a lovely array of daisies and dillweed this year, but has struggled to keep the weeds and AI data centres out of her garden. “I’m out […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Woman Has Already Planted 25% of a Simon and Garfunkel Song

July 3, 2025 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Area woman Olga Sawatzky, 61, is very impressed with her garden this year and says she’s especially excited to be one-quarter of a popular Simon and Garfunkel song. “Not that I listen to […]

Unger & Thirst

Dill Harvest Early this Year

July 2, 2025 Andrew

SWIFT CURRENT, SK After a nice stretch of warm weather and a lot of rain, the Swift Current dill harvest is already upon us. “It’s early this year, but that just means the pickles will […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Woman Has So Much Rhubarb She Doesn’t Know What To Do With It All

September 15, 2022 Andrew

WINKLER, MB For the first time in her 83-year-existence, Mrs. Wiens of Winkler has more rhubarb than she knows what to do with yet once. “Oba, waut de kuckuck will I do with all this […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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