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frugality

Unger Conviction

8% Tithe Now Acceptable Due to Economic Downturn

February 6, 2018 Andrew

MOUNTAIN LAKE, MN After a slumping economy and soaring unemployment rate, the Society for the Proliferation of Mennonite Churches has determined that “an 8% tithe will be acceptable for the foreseeable future.” The change was […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Couple Gets Second Bathroom

January 3, 2018 Andrew

LANDMARK, MB After years of sharing the same washroom, local couple, Walter and Susanna Martens, have finally decided to upgrade their Landmark bungalow by adding a luxurious second bathroom. “As soon as I saw those […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Man Subsists Entirely on Free Hot Dogs

September 18, 2017 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB For more than thirty years, local man Mr. F. Wiens has been a fixture at free hot dog giveaways across the Hanover area. From grand openings to open houses and church picnics to […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Woman Refuses to Pay for Superstore Bags

June 29, 2017 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Local woman Doris Goosen had her arms full yet again on Thursday evening after she refused to pay the 5 cents for the Superstore plastic bags. “I don’t care if it take me […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Politician Pushes for $0.15 Minimum Wage

June 3, 2017 Andrew

TORONTO, ON Local Mennonite MPP Allan Schultz is calling for the Ontario government to set the minimum wage at 15 cents an hour, a rate he claims is a lot more than he “got for […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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