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Unger Conviction

Congregation Forced to Repeat “Good Morning” Over and Over Until it’s Loud Enough for the Pastor

October 20, 2020 Andrew

SEMINOLE, TX Darryl Friesen, 41, the hip new associate pastor at West Seminole Mennonite Church, took the stage for his sermon on Judges 19 this Sunday and was shocked by the half-hearted “good morning” he […]

Unger Suspicion

Paris Woman Suddenly Realizes She Actually Likes Tourists

August 24, 2020 Andrew

PARIS, FRANCE After six months of nearly empty streets in her home town, Juliette Martin, 31, of Paris, France has decided that if the tourists ever come back she’s going to be nice to them […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Couple Come Late to Church and Have to Settle for Front Row

April 17, 2019 Andrew

SASKATOON, SK The Driedgers of Saskatoon had a pretty hectic morning this Sunday when the toaster didn’t work, the hot water tank blew up and they just had to squeeze in a quick meddachschlop right […]

Unger Conviction

Cold Reception in Church Lobby Sparks New Ice Age

July 16, 2018 Andrew

OMAHA, NE The entire state of Nebraska slipped into a new ice age last Sunday after members of Omaha Community Mennonite did their usual thing of talking with their friends and half-heartedly welcoming newcomers. The […]

Unger Conviction

Church Sets Record With 7 Hour Welcome Time

April 20, 2018 Andrew

WINKLER, MB When the pastor of South Winkler Gospel Mennonite Church decided to ask the congregation to turn around and heartily welcome the folks around them, little did he know they would break a long-standing […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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