The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About
  • Merch
  • Andrew Unger

food

Unger Conviction

Dozens of Mennonites Take Ill On Stale Communion Crackers

July 21, 2025 Andrew

LANCASTER, PA Nearly thirty congregants at the local Mennonite church had to go home early this Sunday after partaking in communion with some pretty sketchy looking crackers. “We’ve been using the same box of crackers […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Man Impressed with Such Large Portions of Such Poor Quality Food

January 3, 2025 Andrew

AYLMER, ON Area man Garry Kehler, 57, was very impressed with the huge portions of grisly disgusting “beef” he received at his favourite local diner Dave’s Feeding Trough. “Nobody else is doing portion sizes like […]

Unger & Thirst

Banana Turns Brown Mere Seconds After Entering House

December 11, 2024 Andrew

ELKHART, IN Tina Yoder, 61, of Elkhart had just got out of the theology class she’s been auditing, when she decided she needed to stop by at the grocery store for a few items before […]

Unger Games

Mennonite Runner Turns Map Into Giant Dancing Dill Pickle

December 9, 2024 Andrew

KITCHENER, ON Area man Gabe Eby, 29, has been jogging all over KW during the past few months creating patterns on his running app that his fellow Mennonites will find recognizable and comforting. “At first […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Man Unable to Identify His Own Wife’s Potato Salad at Church Potluck

November 4, 2024 Andrew

BOW ISLAND, AB Dave Pankratz, 61, of Bow Island, Alberta was in quite the predicament at the church potluck this week as he tried to identify his own wife’s potato salad from among the more […]

Posts pagination

1 2 … 21 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Parents Punish Misbehaving Children By Forcing Them To Attend Annual Saengerfest
    December 14, 2016
  • Rubbers Completely Fill Mennonite Church Lobby
    December 27, 2017
  • Mennonite Olympic Dominance, as Explained By Dr. Freud
    August 19, 2016
  • Wardrobe Malfunction Taints Mennonite Quartet Performance
    February 5, 2017
  • Brilliant Man Disproves Global Warming By Pointing Out the Weather
    February 6, 2019

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2025 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved