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The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Emerges All Cool and Trendy After Hip Replacement

June 24, 2025 Andrew

MORDEN-WINKLER, MB Area man Timothy Reimer, 69, has emerged from a hip replacement surgery as the hippest man in all of Reinland. “I no longer listen to gospel quartets. From now on it’s all Kendrick […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Woman’s Medicine Cabinet Filled with Brandy

October 24, 2024 Andrew

ROSTHERN, SK Area woman Ruth Penner, 71, felt a sniffle coming on his morning and decided she needed to check her medicine cabinet to see what she had in stock. “Ahh, I think this should […]

The Daily Bonnet

Steinbach Dentist Concerned About Plaque

July 6, 2024 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB After taking a historic walking tour of Steinbach, Manitoba this weekend, local dentist D.K. Tahn expressed concerns about all the plaques he saw around town. “There was a Barkman plaque and a Reimer […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Asks Doctor for ‘Tipping Exemption’

November 21, 2021 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Frugal local man Dan Kehler has just asked his doctor for an official certificate stating that he is “medically incapable of tipping.” “It causes me such angst to tip,” said Kehler, “and I […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Woman Eager to Tell Everyone About Her Medical History

September 8, 2021 Andrew

CHILLIWACK, BC Taunte Lina, 86, of Chilliwack was devastated to find a sign on the door of a local business saying that they were defying government health orders requiring proof of vaccination and would not […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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