Mennonites to Spend ‘Pride Month’ Pretending to be Humble


Concerned about the increase in pride during the month of June, several Mennonite churches in the area have vowed to really show off their humility this month instead.

“No one’s as humble as us,” said Pastor Jake. “They say pride comes before a fall, which is why we’re going to display our humility for all to see instead.”

The month will feature several exciting events including a parade of humble Mennonites walking slowly down Talbot Street and holding up the traffic.

“We don’t want to be prideful and draw attention to ourselves,” said Pastor Jake, “which is why we’re going to deck ourselves out in dour-looking uniforms and yell Bible verses at everyone.”

The Humility Month will wrap up with an awards ceremony at the end of the month.

“We’ve got trophies for everything—-best black suit, most judgmental attitude, most public display of humility—you name it.”

Pastor Jake says Mennonites are well known for their humility and this month they’re finally going to be proud of it.

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