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Unger Games

Unger Games

Mennonite Woman Refuses to Watch Hockey Until the Oilers Stop Streaking

January 27, 2024 Andrew

EDMONTON, AB Concerned about protecting the purity of her household, area woman Nita Dyck has forbidden her entire family from watching any more Edmonton Oilers games until this “streak” is over. “Everyone is talking about […]

Unger Games

Winnipeg Kids Excited for New ‘Princess Elsa Stadium’

January 25, 2024 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Children all over the Winnipeg metro area (so, like, umm, Winnipeg plus Niverville or something) were super excited about the announcement of the new Princess Elsa Stadium. “They’re losing sleep over it,” said […]

Unger Games

Taylor Swift Fulfills Lifelong Dream of Meeting Zach Collaros

January 22, 2024 Andrew

KANSAS CITY, MO Singer-songwriter Taylor Swift has decided she no longer needs to attend football games anymore after sharing a box seat with Winnipeg Blue Bombers quarterback Zach Collaros. “It’s all downhill from here,” said […]

Unger Games

F1 Fans Really Excited for New Mennonite Driver Max Fe’schlucken

January 17, 2024 Andrew

FRANCORCHAMPS, BELGIUM Formula 1 fans are really excited to see new young Mennonite driver Max Fe’schlucken, who hopes to be the first F1 driver to win a Grand Prix using only a team of horses. […]

Unger Games

Arena to Change Name Every Couple Years So You Never Remember What it’s Called

January 15, 2024 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB The downtown arena in Winnipeg has a radical new plan to make sure sports and music fans alike never know what the heck it’s called these days. “At first we thought we’d change […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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