Unger Suspicion
A List of Famous Dicks Who Are Not Mennonite
You know those people who sit all the way to the end of the credits at a movie? What on earth are they doing? We know there’s no bonus scene at the end of Lady […]
Unger Suspicion
Unger Games
Children Support Literacy By Reading to Hockey Players
BRANDON, MB February is ‘I Love to Read’ month and that means children across the province will be taking time out of their busy schedules to promote literacy in the hockey playing population. One local […]
Unger Suspicion
Hidden Farmer Sausage Discovered in Obama’s Portrait
WASHINGTON, DC “It’s clearly a secret message for the Russian Mennonite community,” said Elder Janzen of Omaha. “He had formavorscht on the brain.” Janzen is referring to the recent portrait of former President Barack Obama, […]
Unger Suspicion
Lonely White Male Spends Romantic Evening Alone Watching Ben Shapiro Videos
CALGARY, AB Jeffrey Froese, 31, manager at a local Office Depot, plans to spend an intimate evening alone tonight watching videos by controversial right-wing political pundit Ben Shapiro. This is basically what Froese does every […]
Unger Games
Canadian Olympians Forced to Pay Back Half Their Medals in Taxes
PYEONGCHANG, SOUTH KOREA Always on the lookout for new sources of revenue, the Canadian government has announced it will be taxing Olympic medals at the top income tax bracket of 48.7 percent. The medals will […]