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The Daily Bonnet

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The Daily Bonnet

Divorced Mennonites Remain Cousins, Legal Expert Says

August 2, 2016 Andrew

HARRISONBURG, VA Settling an age-old question that had baffled legal scholars for centuries, renowned barrister and American law expert Aganetha L. Schneider of Harrisonburg claims there’s no longer any room for debate when it comes to Mennonite […]

The Daily Bonnet

Welcome to Steinbach, Parade Capital of Canada

July 29, 2016 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Steinbach, Manitoba, founded in 1874 by Russian Mennonites, has grown from a tiny village on an insignificant stony creek into a booming metropolis of nearly 15,000 people where anyone and everyone is free […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Insists on Wearing Suspenders to Nude Beach

July 27, 2016 Andrew

PATRICIA BEACH, MB Sun-lovers at a Lake Winnipeg clothing-optional beach were a little shocked this weekend as Delbert Krahn, from the West Reserve, was unwilling to remove his suspenders before taking to the waters. “I don’t never […]

The Daily Bonnet

Manitoba Couple Visits Abbotsford Relatives Never to Return

July 24, 2016 Andrew

ABBOTSFORD, BC A newly married couple from Morden, Ben and Emma Doerksen, recently visited frintschoft in British Colombia on their honeymoon this July, and have decided to stay on the west coast permanently. “We just knew […]

The Daily Bonnet

City of Winkler to Stage Massive Publicity Stunt to Compete With Steinbach

July 23, 2016 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Tired of all the national media attention that Steinbach has been receiving lately, the City of Winkler is seeking to garner some publicity of their own and is consulting the public for ideas. “We […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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