The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About
  • Merch
  • Andrew Unger

The Daily Bonnet

Your trusted source for Mennonite satire.

Brought to you by:

The Daily Bonnet

7 Mennonite Sisters Marry 7 Mennonite Brothers in Epic Septuple Wedding

October 30, 2017 Andrew

ROSETOWN, MB Brothers Jeff, Peter, Steve, Colin, John, Abe, and Patrick Brandt married sisters Rose, Mary Ann, Sally, Susan, Nettie, Aileen and Ruth Janzen in Rosetown’s largest ever wedding this past week. “There’s just something […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Switches Between English and Plautdietsch a Record 3000 Times in a Single Conversation

October 29, 2017 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Local man Earl Peters reverted to Plautdietsch more than 3000 times during an hour-long conversation about beets with his friend Dan Friesen at the coffee shop this past week. The intermittent Plautdietsch usage […]

The Daily Bonnet

Thrift Store Confuses Shot Glasses for Candle Holders

October 28, 2017 Andrew

NEW HOLLAND, PA More than three dozen shot glasses were mislabeled as candleholders at the local MCC store this week. It was the largest mislabeling of booze containers since volunteers at the MB church confused […]

The Daily Bonnet

Rhoda Janzen’s Little Black Dress Fetches $5 Million on eBay

October 24, 2017 Andrew

FRESNO, CA Best-selling Mennonite writer and scholar Rhoda Janzen’s little black dress shattered online auction records this week, eventually selling for just over $5 million. Not only did the auction break records for Mennonite-worn dresses, […]

The Daily Bonnet

Retired ‘Main Street Cruiser’ to Become ‘Sunday Driver’

October 23, 2017 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Local man Menno Fast, 61, is officially retiring from driving up and down Winkler Main Street in his ’96 Honda Civic on Friday nights to, instead, drive really slow in an ’03 Buick […]

Posts pagination

« 1 … 199 200 201 … 263 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Mennonite Woman Introduces New Social Network Called ‘Knipschat’
    July 3, 2019
  • Mennonite Man Unable to Identify His Own Wife’s Potato Salad at Church Potluck
    November 4, 2024
  • Mennonite Man Caught Watching Figure Skating
    February 15, 2022
  • Can We Guess Your Age? (For Mennonites)
    May 18, 2018
  • ‘O Canada’ Performed in Low German Before Jets Game
    December 18, 2023

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2026 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved