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The Daily Bonnet

Your trusted source for Mennonite satire.

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The Daily Bonnet

Young Entrepreneur Sells ‘Star Maps’ to Steinbach Homes

September 11, 2017 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Never let anyone tell you that the entrepreneurial spirit in southern Manitoba is dead. A 19-year-old local go-getter named Colin has just launched a brand new listing of celebrity homes in Steinbach. Modelled after the famed […]

The Daily Bonnet

Upcoming Hurricanes To Be Given Mennonite Names

September 6, 2017 Andrew

Whether suffering through blizzards in Canada or roasting in the Paraguayan Chaco, Mennonites are well-known for their love of extreme weather. As a result, the World Meteorological Association is greatly concerned about the number of […]

The Daily Bonnet

Your 2019-2020 Mennonite School Supply List

September 2, 2017 Andrew

Dear Mr. and Mrs. Unger, Welcome to Friedensruh School. Prädja Enns and I are very happy to have your children Abe, Mary, Anne, Henry, Knels, Lina, Elizabeth, Ruth, Art, Sarah, Nettie, Johan, Martha, Benjamin, and […]

Quizzes

How’s Your Plautdietsch? Test Your Knowledge of Mennonite Low German.

September 1, 2017 Andrew

Many Swiss Mennonites and Amish speak Pennsylvania Dutch. (You can test your knowledge of that language here). However, the language of many Russian Mennonites is known as Plautdietsch or Low German. Alright, so, Kjenn jie […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Lady Uses Google Earth to Spy on Neighbours

August 31, 2017 Andrew

BLUMENGART, MB Mrs. Kleinsasser of the Blumengart area has discovered a fancy new tool to find out all the latest news about the neighbours: Google Earth. Ever since being shown the online tool by her […]

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