OMAHA, NE Malls were packed this weekend for the kickoff of summer. And you know what that means – deals on all the hottest World War III apparel. “There’s camo everywhere,” said eager shopper Kathy […]
KANANASKIS, AB After months of hostility and chaos across the globe, G7 leaders have decided to cool things down a little in Kananaskis with a nice friendly crokinole tournament. “And the winner gets Greenland,” said […]
WASHINGTON, DC After a highly publicized rift with the White House in recent weeks, Elon Musk has finally acknowledged the source of his schismatic idea. “As we all know, I’m not really an ideas man. […]
SAN FRANCISCO, CA With the trade war heating up, Donald Trump recently announced he would be reopening Alcatraz with the sole purpose of imprisoning Canadians who’ve hurt his feelings on social media. “Cross the border […]
WASHINGTON, DC Gearing up for his first international visit to Washington, DC, Prime Minister Mark Carney took an intensive three week crash course in tongue-biting from someone who is a world renowned expert in the […]
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