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Unger the Influence

Unger the Influence

James Comey Indicted Over ‘606 47’ Seashell Photo

May 3, 2026 Andrew

WASHINGTON, DC Former FBI director James Comey was indicted this week after posting a photo of seashells that had been arranged to spell ‘606 47.’ “You know what that means?” said President Trump. “Quite frankly […]

Unger the Influence

Hog Farmers Concerned as Manitoba Seeks to Ban AI

May 2, 2026 Andrew

NEW BOTHWELL, MB Mr. Plett is up in arms this week after Premier Wab Kinew announced plans to ban AI. “What do they expect us to do?” said Plett. “Been so long since I’ve done […]

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Doug Ford to Exclusively Travel by Horse and Buggy from Now On

April 19, 2026 Andrew

NEW HAMBURG, ON Days after it was discovered the Ontario Premier was getting around in a $28 million private jet, Doug Ford announced he would be getting a Martin or Eby to cart him around […]

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Conservatives Form Majority Government

April 14, 2026 Andrew

OTTAWA, ON After a barrage of floor crossing and a couple by-elections this week, Mark Carney and the Conservative Party of Canada have finally formed a majority government. “Canadians have spoken loud and clear—they want […]

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“I thought it was me as a trajchtmoaka,” Trump says

April 13, 2026 Andrew

WASHINGTON, DC After posting a blasphemous AI-generated photo of himself as Jesus this weekend, President Trump is now saying he had no idea it was Jesus and actually thought it was him as a traditional […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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