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Articles by Andrew

Unger Games

After 20 Years in Calgary, Manitoba Man Still Hasn’t Skied

December 16, 2017 Andrew

CALGARY, AB After moving to Calgary back in 1997, former Manitoba resident Jeremy Berg still has yet to strap on a pair of skies, much to the chagrin of his new Alberta friends. “Frankly, I […]

Unger Suspicion

Local Man Finally Switches from Cassette to CD Just in Time for the Demise of CDs

December 15, 2017 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Area man Bennie B. Plett, 67, has finally decided to get rid of all his old gospel tapes and replace them with this new technology he just discovered called the Compact Disc, or […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mannanites are Feeling Vary Blast This Time of Year Yet

December 15, 2017 Andrew

LA CRETE, AB Mannanites across western Canada have been sharing #blast memes throughout the holiday season this year yet. “Like and share if you’re feeling sea gut and blast dis year,” said Mrs. Petkau of […]

Unger Suspicion

Jeff Bridges, John Goodman Reunite for ‘The Big Sawatzky’

December 14, 2017 Andrew

HOLLYWOOD, CA The Coen Brothers have just wrapped up filming the sequel to their 1998 cult hit The Big Lebowski. The new film, entitled The Big Sawatzky, which reunites Jeff Bridges with John Goodman, Steve […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Steakhouse Adds Fried Bologna to Menu

December 13, 2017 Andrew

ABBOTSFORD, BC The Purple Koo, Abbotsford’s toniest steakhouse, is about to get a little bit tonier, with the addition of prime cut grade A fried bologna to the menu. The addition of bologna is in […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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