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Articles by Andrew

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Woman Sings the Wrong Version of ‘Away in a Manger’

December 22, 2019 Andrew

CHILLIWACK, BC A fight broke out during an Epp gathering in the church basement this week after Grandma Epp insisted on singing the wrong version of ‘Away in a Manger.’ “Diewel, that woman. She just […]

Unger Games

Strangely Content Bombers Fans Don’t Ask for Any Presents This Year

December 21, 2019 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Long-suffering fans of the Winnipeg Blue Bombers have decided not to ask for a single thing for Christmas this year, since they already got their presents back in November. “I asked my Earl […]

Unger Conviction

Attempt at Singing ‘Silent Night’ in German Fizzles Out After First Line

December 20, 2019 Andrew

NEW BOTHWELL, MB The annual Christmas sing-along at the Falk gathering this evening became quite awkward after someone suggested they do ‘Silent Night’ in the original German. “Oh, sure, they were gung ho at first, […]

Quizzes

What is Your Favourite Wall?

December 19, 2019 Andrew

Around Schteinbach averybody knows Kjnels Wall who is the most famous chicken catcher this side of the Red River. But what about the other walls yet? Mannanites love walls, probably because about 80% of us […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Family Absolutely Loves Their Brand New ‘EMC Sierra’ Truck

December 18, 2019 Andrew

RIDGEWOOD, MB When the Duecks of Steinbach were in the market for a new vehicle that could transport their growing family, they test drove a lot of trucks, but ultimately could not resist getting into […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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