WASHINGTON, DC
President Donald Trump has just approved the expenditure of $81 billion to construct a wooden fence along the border to keep Canadian smoke from entering the country.
“They’re not sending their best smoke, let me tell you,” said Trump. “Those Canadians are nasty. Nasty people. Their smoke is crossing over completely illegally.”
The proposed fence will be upwards of 4 feet high and will be made only of the sturdiest of materials.
“We know exactly how that illegal smoke is getting in,” said Trump, “and I am certain this fence will do the trick. It’s the best fence. I know a lot about fences. And walls, too. The very best.”
At press time, the fence had already been overtaken with algae.