The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About
  • Merch
  • Andrew Unger

Month: June 2025

Unger Games

Jonathan Toews Signs with Only Team that Knows How to Pronounce His Last Name Correctly

June 20, 2025 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB The Winnipeg Jets scored a major coup this week after signing hometown hero and NHL legend Jonathan Toews, who, according to rumours, signed with the team exclusively because “they’re the only ones who […]

Unger Suspicion

School Accidentally Plays Sex Pistols Song Before Morning Announcements

June 19, 2025 Andrew

DOLPHIN, MB After months of controversy and debate, Dolphin School Trustee Pete Caflib has finally convinced his local school division to bring back the Royal Anthem. “Yeah, so I picked up a bunch of 45s […]

The Daily Bonnet

Chatty Mennonite Woman Holds Elevator Door for a Record 5 Hours

June 17, 2025 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB There was a lineup stretching down the hallway this afternoon, as Mrs. Enns held the elevator door for “just a couple more minutes.” Well, those minutes soon became hours, as Mrs. Enns had […]

Unger Games

City Turns Every Available Flat Surface into Pickleball Courts

June 16, 2025 Andrew

CALGARY, AB The City of Calgary has recently unveiled a new plan to turn every bit of flat surface area in the city into pickleball courts. “Church parking lots, private driveways, significant stretches of Deerfoot […]

Unger the Influence

G7 Summit to Feature Crokinole Tournament

June 14, 2025 Andrew

KANANASKIS, AB After months of hostility and chaos across the globe, G7 leaders have decided to cool things down a little in Kananaskis with a nice friendly crokinole tournament. “And the winner gets Greenland,” said […]

Posts pagination

« 1 2 3 4 … 6 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Mennonites Shocked as Oscar Announcer Pronounces ‘Toews’ Correctly
    March 14, 2023
  • “That’s a personal question”: Area Politician Remains Silent on Science and Logic
    August 2, 2021
  • Three Hours Later, Mennonite Man Still Working on that Piece of Chokecherry Pie
    August 12, 2018
  • Mennonite Man Wins A Million Dollars Worth of Farmer Sausage After Mr. Loeppky Scores 5 Goals in Floor Hockey Game
    November 24, 2018
  • Mennonite Runner Turns Map Into Giant Dancing Dill Pickle
    December 9, 2024

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2026 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved