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Month: August 2017

The Daily Bonnet

Dodge Caravan Sets World Land Speed Record

August 13, 2017 Andrew

BONNEVILLE SALT FLATS, UT The Giesbrecht family of Grunthal, Manitoba has just set a new land speed record of more than 715 km/h (444 mph) at the Bonneville Salt Flats in Utah. With Mr. Peter Giesbrecht at […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Brethren and General Conference Forced to Share Folklorama Pavilion

August 12, 2017 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Folklorama is an annual festival celebrating the harmonious multicultural mosaic of Manitoba. However, conflict erupted this year after organizers required Mennonite Brethrens and Mennonite Church Canada (formerly General Conference) members to share the […]

Unger Suspicion

What Should Saskatchewan Premier Brad Wall Do In Retirement?

August 11, 2017 Andrew

SWIFT CURRENT, SK Brad Wall, popular long-serving Premier of Saskatchewan, and the only Mennonite Premier in Canada, announced Thursday that he would be retiring from politics in the near future. Mennonites across Saskatchewan were saddened and […]

Unger Conviction

Winkler Church to Install Roundabout in Parking Lot

August 10, 2017 Andrew

WINKLER, MB The roundabout craze has taken the Pembina Valley by storm with city streets, local businesses and, now, even churches trying to cash in on the fad. Winkler Mennonite Bible Church plans to spend $3,000,000 […]

Unger Suspicion

Hundreds of Amish Pay Tribute to Glen Campbell by Parading Around Town in Rhinestone Suits

August 9, 2017 Andrew

INTERCOURSE, PA The moratorium against flashy clothing was temporarily lifted last night as hundreds of Amish men and women took to the streets of Intercourse sporting gaudy rhinestone suits in tribute to the late great country legend […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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