The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About The Unger Review
  • Andrew Unger

Month: June 2017

The Daily Bonnet

Dutch Blitz Players Now Required to Wear Full Body Armour

June 13, 2017 Andrew

LANCASTER, PA The Pennsylvania Supreme Court has recently ruled that all Dutch Blitz players in the region must sport full body armour from now on. “This is for your own good. It’s for your own protection,” […]

Unger & Thirst

Lemonade Stand Money Goes Directly to Dad

June 12, 2017 Andrew

LA CRETE, AB Like all money generated by any member of the Wiens family, the income produced by Susie and Danny’s lemonade stand this weekend went directly to their father. “If they’re living under my […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Man Accidentally Consumes a Vegetable

June 12, 2017 Andrew

LINDEN, AB Local man Klass Klassen, 53, was rushed to the hospital this past week after it was discovered he had inadvertently consumed two carrots and a few florets of broccoli. “Mennonites are highly allergic […]

The Daily Bonnet

Man Takes ‘Naked Anabaptist’ Far Too Literally

June 11, 2017 Andrew

LONDON, UK Stuart Murray’s book ‘The Naked Anabaptist’ has been monumental in promoting the Anabaptist Christian tradition in the United Kingdom and around the world. For one London man, however, the book has become a little […]

Unger Suspicion

Mennonites Overwhelmingly Prefer Adam West to Any Other Batman

June 11, 2017 Andrew

ANAHEIM, CA Being sensible and civilized people, Mennonites across North America have expressed an overwhelming preference for the late Adam West’s version of Batman. A recent survey showed that 91% of Mennonites chose Adam West […]

Posts pagination

« 1 … 5 6 7 … 9 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Friesen Family Musical Ensemble Breaks Up
    November 26, 2018
  • Mennonite Man Tries to Pass Off Farmer Sausage as Kubasa
    September 8, 2024
  • Uncle Undoes Pants Button to Make Room for More Sausage
    July 2, 2017
  • Documentary “The Shape of Water” Tells the Story of a Mennonite Woman and Her Husband Abe
    March 8, 2018
  • Beloved Mennonite Sex Educator to Be Honoured at Church this Sunday
    July 3, 2023

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2025 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved