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taylor swift

Unger Suspicion

Abbotsford Woman Mortgages House to Pay for Taylor Swift Tickets

November 5, 2023 Andrew

ABBOTSFORD, BC As soon as Taylor Swift announced her upcoming Vancouver shows, area woman Megan Berg was on the phone with the loans department at her local credit union. “The house is worth 2.3 million, […]

The Daily Bonnet

Taylor Swift Spotted on Kansas Farm in Full Mennonite Attire

October 1, 2023 Andrew

GOESSEL, KS Just days after first hooking up with Kansas City football star Travis Kelce, pop star Taylor Swift has fully immersed herself  in Kansas Mennonite culture. “We knew it wouldn’t take long and she’d […]

Unger Games

Canadian Swifties Demand Taylor Date at Least One CFL Star

September 25, 2023 Andrew

TORONTO, ON After word got out that Taylor Swift was dating NFL star Travis Kelce, north-of-the-border Swifties are demanding that she “stop ignoring our league.” “What has she got against Canadian football? There’s a lot […]

Unger Suspicion

Taylor Swift Announces Massive Countrywide Tour of Toronto

August 3, 2023 Andrew

TORONTO, ON The prayers of Swifties across Canada have been answered this week after Taylor Swift announced a 6-date cross-country tour of the Rogers Centre in Toronto. “We’re sending our tunes all across the nation, […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Pastor Enters Sanctuary Hidden in a Broom Cart

June 28, 2023 Andrew

MOUNTAIN LAKE, MN The rumours are true. Video footage confirms this week that Mountain Lake’s most popular pastor Tyler Schmidt sneaks into the sanctuary each Sunday hidden in a broom cart. “Tyleeeeer! Tyleeeer!” screamed Mountain […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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