The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About
  • Merch
  • Andrew Unger

pacifism

Unger Conviction

Poppy and Peace Button Wage War for Space on Mennonite Man’s Lapel

November 11, 2019 Andrew

KITCHENER, ON For more than fifty years the vacant space on Mr. Funk’s lapel has been quiet and peaceful. Sadly, however, a war for territorial supremacy has recently broken out between a poppy and an […]

Unger Conviction

Fight Breaks Out for Church Pew on ‘Peace Sunday’

November 10, 2019 Andrew

SASKATOON, SK West Saskatoon Mennonite Church’s Peace Sunday service was interrupted right in the middle of the responsive reading after the Wiebes came in late and demanded a spot in a pew occupied by the […]

The Daily Bonnet

Hipsters Forced to Cut Off Beards After Violating Pennsylvania Mennonite Patent

October 29, 2019 Andrew

LANCASTER, PA Thousands of hipsters across the United States will be forced to shave off their beards at the end of this month after a Pennsylvania court ruled these beards a “clear violation” of a […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Hunter Shoots and Eats Groundhog, No Spring This Year

February 2, 2019 Andrew

PUNXSUTAWNEY, PA A Mennonite hunter from rural Pennsylvania shot and ate an innocent little weather-forecasting groundhog yesterday, thus condemning the entire continent to perpetual winter. Mr. Yoder said the groundhog was delicious, but says he […]

Unger Suspicion

Spoiler Alert: Simba is Pacifist in New ‘Lion King’ Remake

November 28, 2018 Andrew

HOLLYWOOD, CA In an effort to clean up the violent image of the previous film, the good folks at Disney have made a refreshing change to the new Lion King movie. Instead of defeating the […]

Posts pagination

« 1 … 7 8 9 … 15 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Who is the ‘Mennonite Pope’?
    October 18, 2017
  • Top Ten Things to Expect Now that a Steinbacher is in Charge
    September 1, 2021
  • Mennonite Man Translates Low German Joke for Englishers, No One Laughs
    March 26, 2019
  • Local Dad Gets Full Time Job Carting His Kids Around to Sports
    November 25, 2025
  • Anne Murray Flies Over Province Singing ‘Snowbird’
    May 14, 2020

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2026 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved