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movies

The Daily Bonnet

Open Casting Call in Winkler for New ‘Planet of the Abes’ Movie

December 3, 2019 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Abes across the Pembina Valley will be flocking to the parking lot at the EMBCC church this weekend to have a chance to take part in the new ‘Planet of the Abes’ movie. […]

Unger Suspicion

Cheech & Chong Heading Straight for Niverville

November 27, 2019 Andrew

NIVERVILLE, MB After hearing the results of the recent cannabis plebiscite in the Mennonite town of Niverville, Cheech & Chong loaded up their VW van and hope to be in town by this weekend. “We’ll […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Woman Seeks Treatment for Her Hallmark Christmas Movie Addiction

November 22, 2019 Andrew

SASKATOON, SK Mrs. Martens of Saskatoon has been checked in a rehab facility this week after it was discovered that she has been doing nothing but eating popcorn and watching terribly-acted predictable Christmas movies on […]

Unger Suspicion

Kevin Costner to Star in Epic $300 Million Film About Mennonites

October 19, 2019 Andrew

HOLLYWOOD, CA In an effort to revive his stalling career, 90s Hollywood icon Kevin Costner has invested more than $300 million of his own money in a “totally epic” film about the Mennonites entitled Field of […]

Quizzes

How much do you know about Mennonite movies?

October 16, 2019 Andrew

Mennonites? Movies? It doesn’t give such! Oh, yes, it does. Mennonites have created and been depicted in film for almost as long as movies have existed. So, let’s see how well you know your Menno […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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