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The Daily Bonnet

Theology Prof Accidentally Lectures Physics Class

August 31, 2024 Andrew

ABBOTSFORD, BC Pleased to see a full lecture hall full of students ready for his talk on the consubstantial nature of the trinity, Dr. Warkentin was a full 40 minutes into the class before Physics […]

Unger Conviction

Commuter Sets Record for Consecutive Days Dining Alone in Bible College Cafeteria

February 1, 2024 Andrew

BIEBELPLATZ, AB Area man Jeremy Goerzen, 20, decided he’d save a bit of cash this year and commute to Biebelplatz Bible College from Calgary. But little did Jeremy know what this decision would do for […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite College Students Crash ChatGPT by Requesting Too Many Hauerwas Essays All at Once

February 7, 2023 Andrew

HIEBERTFELD, SK Students at Mennonite colleges and universities nearly crashed the system this week by asking ChatGPT to create 5-page essays on the work of Stanley Hauerwas. “We had thousands of requests within minutes. It […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Family Discovered Camping in Briercrest Parking Lot

August 23, 2022 Andrew

CARONPORT, SK The custodial crew at Briercrest Bible College and Seminary were in quite the state of shock this morning as they found that a whole nest of Mennonite families had pulled over for the […]

The Daily Bonnet

Which Mennonite Colleges and Universities Made the ‘Final Four’?

April 7, 2022 Andrew

BLUFFTON, OH Every spring, Mennonite post-secondary institutions gather in Bluffton, Ohio to drink decaf and argue about seemingly trivial differences in theology. The event begins with dozens of school, but eventually the best debaters make […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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