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The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Students Pin Malcolm Gladwell Posters All Over Their Lockers

September 7, 2021 Andrew

WATERLOO, ON Students at Conrad Grebel University College were shown to their lockers this week and immediately began plastering Malcolm Gladwell posters all over them. “It used to be all Stanley Hauerwas, but young Mennonites […]

The Daily Bonnet

Steinbach Man Plans to Review New Miriam Toews Book Without Even Having Read It

August 29, 2021 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Even though he has no intention of reading it, local man and avid Danny Orlis reader Mr. Klippenstein, 71, is absolutely certain he knows all there is to know about Miriam Toews’ new […]

The Daily Bonnet

Local Author Stays Covid Safe with Ingenious Stick and Pen Combo

May 28, 2021 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Unable to host any in-person book signings since his novel Once Removed was released, local author Andrew Unger has created an ingenious new invention that should solve the problem. “People will finally start […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Authors Eager to Get their Books Banned by Local Christian Bookstore

May 4, 2021 Andrew

NAJUNGES, MB With no chance to do book signings and public readings, it hasn’t been an easy year for authors trying to promote their new books. However, there’s a glimmer of hope in the air […]

The Daily Bonnet

The Seven Hottest Mennonite Sex Positions

February 14, 2021 Andrew

Need to spice up your love life? Look no further than the Mennonites! It’s the worst kept secret in the world: Mennonites are near the top when it comes to love-making. How else do you […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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