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birthday

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Mom to Post Embarrassing Birthday Greeting on Your Facebook Wall This Week

January 4, 2023 Andrew

GOSHEN, IN Amanda Funk, 17, of Goshen is fully expecting her mother to post an embarrassing birthday greeting on her Facebook wall this week. “Oh my gosh, here it comes,” said Amanda. “I think she’s […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Man Born February 29, 1944 Finally Old Enough to Have a Drink

February 29, 2020 Andrew

LEAMINGTON, ON A Russlander Mennonite who immigrated to Canada after World War II is finally old enough to consume adult beverages in the province of Ontario. “February 29, 1944 – that’s what my birth certificate […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Woman Receives Most Romantic Birthday Present Ever!

February 22, 2020 Andrew

ALLENTOWN, PA After receiving nothing but kitchen utensils year after year, Mrs. Miller decided she’d hint to her husband that she wanted something a bit more romantic for her 45th birthday this year. “And, boy, […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Grandma Disappoints Children with Honest Birthday Cards

February 16, 2020 Andrew

ALTONA, MB Mrs. Doerksen, 81, of Altona has decided to cut to the chase for birthdays this year and write in big bold letters on the outside of each envelope, “No money enclosed.” “I don’t […]

Unger & Thirst

Area Man Receives a Bag of Ten Thousand Villages Coffee from Every Single Guest at His Birthday Party

January 22, 2020 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Literally every single guest at Mr. Reimer’s 53rd birthday party this week gave him a bag of Ten Thousand Villages fair trade coffee. “That man is impossible to shop for. I wracked my […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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