The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About
  • Merch
  • Andrew Unger

astronomy

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man to Circle the Earth For Next Two Months, Causing Mini-moon

October 1, 2024 Andrew

EARTH A Mennonite man will be circling the Earth for the next two months, causing what scientists are calling a “mini-moon.” “It’s not as large as the moon we usually see,” said Neil DeGrasse Tyson, […]

The Daily Bonnet

Experts Warn Mennonites Against Using Homemade Eclipse Glasses

April 7, 2024 Andrew

LEAMINGTON, ON Not wanting to shell out the cash for real eclipse glasses, thousands of Mennonites in southern Ontario have taken to crafting protective eyewear of their own. Peter Wiens of Leamington, for example, says […]

Unger Conviction

Blood Moon ‘A Sign From God’ that the Reign of the Fundamentalist Mennonite Elders Has Come to an End

July 27, 2018 Andrew

BERGTHAL, MB Conservative Mennonites across North America are interpreting tonight’s blood moon as a ‘clear sign from God’ that they no longer have to follow the ‘bullshit rules’ of the elders and can now live […]

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Local Man So Bored He’d Even Be Willing to Watch Baseball
    March 23, 2020
  • Curling Match Cancelled After Mennonite Men Refuse to Cast the First Stone
    September 23, 2023
  • Plastic Straw Ban Leaves Pacifist Mennonites Completely Defenceless
    June 21, 2018
  • Can We Guess Your Age? (For Mennonites)
    May 18, 2018
  • Mennonite Pastor Hired for Wife’s Ability to Play the Piano
    February 19, 2024

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2026 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved