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Unger Conviction

Editorial: ‘I Think the Lord Would Approve of Our Church Split’

December 2, 2016 Andrew

By: Menno Van Menno, Rosenhof, MB We’ve had a long-standing tradition in this town of splitting the church whenever anyone disagrees on an issue. Now, of course, we are reasonable people. We don’t split over trivial […]

Unger Suspicion

‘Pacifism is Totally Impractical’ Says Large Multinational Weapons Manufacturer

December 1, 2016 Andrew

WASHINGTON, DC Arms industry leaders met in Washington this week to discuss ways of curbing the growing wave of pacifism that’s sweeping the nation. “How the hell can we expect to keep the economy going […]

Unger Conviction

‘Miraculous Tongues’ Turn Out to Be Low German

November 30, 2016 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB An enthusiastic new convert from Winnipeg was amazed by the “miraculous tongues” he heard at a church service in Steinbach this past weekend. “I had never heard or seen anything like it,” said […]

The Daily Bonnet

Morden Man Successfully Stretches Penny Into Copper Wire

November 29, 2016 Andrew

MORDEN, MB Local man, Reginald F. Braun, 63, has been dubbed the ‘Mennonite King Midas’ after becoming the first person to stretch a penny into copper wire. “That old Mr. Braun is just amazing,” said one […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Woman Recalls Traumatic ‘Near-Dance Experience’

November 29, 2016 Andrew

DALMENY, SK Area woman and budding writer Bertha Froese has published a new memoir entitled ‘Dancing is For Real’ which recounts her horrific near-dance experience in the summer of 2012. “There I was at my […]

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