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Unger the Influence

James Talarico Article Pulled from the Unger Review

February 19, 2026 Andrew

SEMINOLE, TEXAS The renowned Mennonite satire site The Unger Review had intended to run an article schputting Texas political candidate James Talarico, but had to pull it at the last minute for unknown reasons. “He’s […]

Unger Games

Canadian Curler Accused of “Knipsing” Stone

February 18, 2026 Andrew

MILAN, ITALY Canadian curler Mark Kennedy has been accused of taking a few strategies from crokinole this week at the Olympics. “The replay clearly shows he knipsed the stone after the hog line,” said curler […]

Unger Suspicion

Manitoba Issues Province-wide “Yellow Snow” Warning

February 17, 2026 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Premier Wab Kinew held an emergency press conference this afternoon to announce the entire province was now under a Yellow Snow Advisory. “Don’t eat it. Don’t touch it. Don’t go anywhere near it,” […]

Unger Suspicion

I Searched the Epstein Files for Mennonite Content – This is What I Found

February 16, 2026 Andrew

NOT SATIRE. I searched the Epstein Files. For real. This is not satire. Please note, of course, that there are millions upon millions of files and none of the findings here suggest any wrongdoing. Here […]

Unger Games

France Humiliates Canada By Losing Only By a Score of 10-2

February 15, 2026 Andrew

MILAN, ITALY The Canadian men’s hockey team was utterly humiliated this evening in Milan after winning only by a score of 10 to 2 versus France. “I gotta say, letting in 2 goals to France […]

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