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Unger Games

Unger Games

Team Canada Loses to Blumenort Menno Knights

December 28, 2024 Andrew

OTTAWA, ON The once mighty Team Canada junior hockey team has lost to a men’s floor hockey team from Blumenort, Manitoba. “It’s hard to top Garth Reimer on the forecheck,” said Team Canada captain Brayden […]

Unger Games

Mennonite Runner Turns Map Into Giant Dancing Dill Pickle

December 9, 2024 Andrew

KITCHENER, ON Area man Gabe Eby, 29, has been jogging all over KW during the past few months creating patterns on his running app that his fellow Mennonites will find recognizable and comforting. “At first […]

Unger Games

Winnipeg Blue Bombers to Relocate to Buffalo

November 18, 2024 Andrew

BUFFALO, NY After shitting the bed in the Grey Cup for three straight seasons, the Winnipeg Blue Bombers announced plans to move the entire team to the city of Buffalo, New York. “I prefer buffalo […]

Unger Games

Taylor Swift Takes the Stage Wearing Blue Bombers Jersey

November 17, 2024 Andrew

TORONTO, ON International pop superstar Taylor Swift took to the stage in Toronto last night wearing a Winnipeg Blue Bombers jersey, apparently her boyfriend’s favourite team. “I’m not sure if this is good luck or […]

Unger Games

Mike Tyson to Fight Mennonite Man Named Jake Pauls

November 15, 2024 Andrew

FRESNO, CA A paperwork mixup has boxing legend Mike Tyson set to square up against Fresno area farmer Jake Pauls tonight. “Yeah, when I got the note in my church mailbox, I thought, ‘oba, it […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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