The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About The Unger Review
  • Andrew Unger

Unger Suspicion

Unger Suspicion

Voters Head to the Polls to Select the 45th Lesser Evil of the United States

November 8, 2016 Andrew

PARIS, TX In a potentially historic election, American voters will head to the polls today to select the new Lesser Evil of the United States. “I’m confused,” said local rancher and undecided voter Dwight Owens, 37, of […]

Unger Suspicion

We Have Now Officially Entered a Peculiar Alternate Universe Where Mel Gibson Makes Movies About Conscientious Objectors

November 4, 2016 Andrew

HOLLYWOOD, CA With the utterly baffling release of Mel Gibson’s new pacifist-thriller Hacksaw Ridge, physicists around the world are suggesting we now have enough evidence to confirm that the controversial multiverse theory might actually have some validity. “Mel Gibson, […]

Unger Suspicion

Search of Clinton’s Wikileaks Emails for the Word “Mennonite” Reveals Not Much of Interest

November 2, 2016 Andrew

Here we have it, folks. This is officially the most unfunny, dull, and least interesting Daily Bonnet post ever. Searching the Clinton emails on wikileaks for the word “Mennonite” revealed 6 copies of one email to Secretary […]

Unger Suspicion

Prime Minister Trudeau is ‘Sick and Tired’ of People Calling Him ‘Justin’

November 2, 2016 Andrew

OTTAWA, ON In a press conference this week, Canadian Prime Minister Trudeau announced he had “had it up to here with people calling me Justin.” The official honorific for a sitting Prime Minister is “Right Honourable […]

Unger Suspicion

Road Construction Complete Just in Time for Blizzard Season

October 31, 2016 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB After a summer and fall of road work on every single street in town, where traffic had ground to a halt, many of Steinbach’s roads have finally reopened just in time for the […]

Posts pagination

« 1 … 157 158 159 … 168 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Flat-Earther Cites Saskatchewan as Evidence
    July 8, 2020
  • World Low German Spelling Bee Championship to Be Held in Grunthal
    June 6, 2016
  • Mennonite Pastor Forbids Standing in Church, Claims it ‘Leads to Dancing’
    May 26, 2017
  • Avid Outdoorsman Spends All Day Indoors Wearing Bass Pro Shops Cap
    August 17, 2023
  • Missionaries Discover New Position
    January 13, 2017

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2025 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved