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The Daily Bonnet

Your trusted source for Mennonite satire.

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The Daily Bonnet

Caravan of Mennonites Heading for U.S. Border

November 5, 2018 Andrew

ABBOTSFORD, BC The Driedger family of Abbotsford have loaded up their Dodge Caravan and are currently heading for the U.S. border. Authorities are on high alert, having been notified not to let any caravans enter […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Woman Accused of Wearing Makeup After Lipstick is Found on Husband’s Collar

November 3, 2018 Andrew

NEUANLAGE, SK Mrs. Neustadter of Neuanlage was hauled in by the church board this week after a bright red streak of lipstick was discovered on her husband’s collar. “I can’t believe that Mrs. Neustadter would […]

The Daily Bonnet

Old Colony Mennonites Confused for Trick-or-Treaters

October 31, 2018 Andrew

WINKLER, MB A group of Old Colony Mennonites were walking around Winkler today and, for some strange reason, people kept handing them Halloween candy. “One lady complemented me on my costume,” said Corny Wall, visiting […]

The Daily Bonnet

Steinbach City Council Candidate Reveals Shocking DNA Test Results

October 23, 2018 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Local city council candidate Mr. Harder decided to take a DNA test this week after being called a “Lutheran” by one of his political rivals. The rival, Mr. Dyck, said he would donate […]

The Daily Bonnet

New TV Show ‘Cash Buggy’ Offers Riders a Chance to Win Money While on the Way to Church

October 20, 2018 Andrew

ST. JACOBS, ON A new spin-off of the popular TV show ‘Cash Cab’ offers conservative Mennonites and Amish the chance to answer a few trivia questions and win a bit of money on their way […]

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