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The Daily Bonnet

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Mennonite Man Attends His First Vanapag Jats Game

December 8, 2018 Andrew

VANAPAG, MB Local man, Abraham Krahn of North Kildonan, was thrilled to get some free tickets to see his favourite hockey team the Vanapag Jats in action last night against the St. Louis Blues. “Its […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Family Forced to Wear Their Parkas Indoors So Dad Can Save on the Hydro Bill

December 5, 2018 Andrew

WINKLER, MB The Doerksen family of Winkler have been wearing their long underwear a lot this winter, thanks to Mr. Doerksen’s insistence that “no one better touch that darn thermostat!” “They keep raising the hydro […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonites Desperately Search for Cheap Used Netflix Subscriptions at MCC Store

December 3, 2018 Andrew

HERBERT, SK Mennonites across Canada have been scouring the shelves at their local MCC thrift stores in search of used Netflix subscriptions after the streaming service jacked up the prices this week. “I heard Mrs. […]

The Daily Bonnet

‘Menno’s Rights Activists’ Burn Their Suspenders in Massive Bonfire

November 21, 2018 Andrew

ABBOTSFORD, BC In honour of International Mennos Day, thousands of Menno’s Rights Activists have been gathering in church basements around the world today to bring awareness to the “shackles placed on Mennonite men by an oppressive […]

The Daily Bonnet

Introducing Every Mennonite’s New Favourite Winter Pastime: Strip Knipsbrat

November 9, 2018 Andrew

SASKATOON, SK Young married couples in small towns all around the Saskatoon region have grown tired of the same old crokinole games on Saturday nights and have decided to add their own twist known as […]

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