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Unger & Thirst

Unger & Thirst

‘Summer McIntosh Borscht’: Mennonites Rename Soup in Honour of Swimmer

August 1, 2024 Andrew

PARIS, FRANCE With two golds and a silver so far at the 2024 games, Summer McIntosh has captured the hearts of the nation, including the Canadian Mennonite population who have renamed a popular borscht after […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Man Takes Extra Shot of Ozempic Before Lunch at Oma’s

July 23, 2024 Andrew

SASKATOON, SK Area man Cameron Hiebert has been trying to inject his way into good health for quite some time, but that hasn’t stopped him from devouring a nice plate of vereniki and formavorscht when […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Man Struggles with Soup at Local Vietnamese Restaurant

July 8, 2024 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Local man, Peter Unger, 41, decided to check out this fabulous soup he’d heard so much about from his friends the Sawatzkys, who pride themselves in their miraculous ability to venture beyond traditional […]

Unger & Thirst

Health Conscious Mennonite Woman Opts for ‘Diet Papsi’

July 4, 2024 Andrew

LINDEN, AB Area woman Agnes Epp, 71, has decided to make a few changes in her life, including reducing her sugar intake. “So that’s why I’ve gone over to the Diet Papsi,” said Epp. “Do […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Couple Saves Millions by Pickling the Watermelon Rinds

July 3, 2024 Andrew

ROSETOWN, MB The Driedgers of Rosetown have found a lucrative new way to save a bit of money – pickling their watermelon rinds. “With the amount my Stanley eats each years, we could be talking […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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