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Unger Conviction

Unger Conviction

Mysterious Formations Appear on Church Parking Lot Overnight

March 21, 2026 Andrew

VANDERHOOF, BC Pastor Dave pulled up onto the lot this morning for his marriage counselling sessions with the Thiessens only to find that the entire lot was covered with mysterious black circles and the whole […]

Unger Conviction

Abbotsford Man Has No Excuse to Miss Church Tomorrow Since He’ll Be Up at 5 AM Anyway Watching Hockey

February 21, 2026 Andrew

ABBOTSFORD, BC Jacob Fehr of Abbotsford has been rather sporadic in his church attendance as of late, but Pastor Dan says he has absolutely no reason to miss church tomorrow since he’ll be up by […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Choir to Perform at Extra-Alternative Halftime Show

February 8, 2026 Andrew

FRESNO, CA For those looking for an alternative halftime show to either Bad Bunny or Kid Rock, the Fresno Central Mennonite Church is inviting guests to listen to their choir this afternoon. “We felt that […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Man Gets Standing Ovation in Switzerland

January 22, 2026 Andrew

DAVOS, SWITZERLAND An unexpected speech from the first man to rebaptize someone as an adult, drew a standing ovation at the World Economic Forum in Switzerland this week. “Wow, that’s quite the reception,” said Conrad […]

Unger Conviction

Dunkers Switch to Pouring After Water Main Break in Calgary

December 31, 2025 Andrew

CALGARY, AB All 7 Mennonite Brethren churches in Calgary have changed their mode of baptism this week after a main break significantly reduced water supply in the city. “We’re just doing our part,” said Pastor […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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