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Articles by Andrew

The Daily Bonnet

‘Going Out of Business’ Sale Attracts Thousands of First Time Customers

October 18, 2016 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB First-time customers arrived in droves this weekend to check out Dueck Hardware’s going-out-of-business sale. The hardware store, started on Main Street in 1973 by Mr. Peter V. Dueck, has served the community for […]

Unger & Thirst

Swiss and Dutch Mennonites Find Common Ground in Their Love for Cheese

October 17, 2016 Andrew

AYLMER, ON When the Anabaptist movement began in 16th century Switzerland, and later spread to Tyrol and the Low Countries, few people could have predicted the tremendous division that would be created within a group of people […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Man Breaks His Vow of Pacifism to Defend the Last Can of Pepsi

October 16, 2016 Andrew

HILLSBORO, KS Centuries of non-violent Anabaptist teaching were tossed under the proverbial bus today as Mr. Thomas W. Koop of Hillsboro, Kansas assaulted fifteen innocent people in order to defend his right to the last […]

Unger & Thirst

Court Rules that Mennonites Are Allowed to Keep Their Masks on in the Liquor Store

October 15, 2016 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB A Steinbach judge ruled today in favour of religious freedom, allowing Mennonites to wear full facial masks in “potentially embarrassing” public places like the liquor store or casino. “I’m pleased with the decision,” […]

The Daily Bonnet

Poll: Vote Now to Decide the Name of Steinbach’s Newest Park!

October 14, 2016 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB The Steinbach recreation committee is asking residents to select the name for a giant new park to be built next spring in the centre of town. After receiving nominations from people throughout Steinbach, the […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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